You Must Get Call Waiting if You Want the Universe’s Messages to Reach You

First, Scott’s back goes out. Here we are set for the vacation of my dreams and my poor man is unable to get out of bed. I think I want to go so badly that I will summon that kind of strength they always used to talk about on “That’s Incredible” when moms lifted cars off of children, and physically carry him on the plane. The only problem is that we – Erin, Scott and I – are all flying out of different airports at different times. Scott comes up with a plan that requires him staying at home at least one day longer for his back to heal and meeting us in Southern Germany. It should all be ok, German trains are fairly reliable and he is seasoned traveler.

Second, Erin calls. Her flight from National to Chicago is being delayed and there is no way she will make her connection to Frankfurt. After a few rapid texts she apparently gets on another flight because I don’t hear from her after she tells me she is trying to get on another flight.

Third, I wait for an hour to get to the security counter and when I finally get through the metal detector I am asked for my boarding pass and passport. I handover passport and notice at that moment that the tickets are not in it where they should be. This calls for a high alert – on my part and an extremely unhelpful reaction from the metal detector worker who just tells me I have to wait on the other side. I point out I don’t have bags to search through for my tickets. He sends someone to pick one up, I search it, nothing. I ask for the second bag, again search and find nothing. I’ve basically given up hope and start to think that maybe I’m just not meant to get to Germany when an alert security person notices me with stockinged feet, two bags, a hat and a bewildered look staring at the security process and points out that there are two tickets laying on the ground near her feet. I inch toward them. Ahh, I can get on the plane, but should I?

I call Scott:

“Hi, its Alexis, I think the universe is trying to tell me not to get on the plane, your back, Erin’s flight and possible person in the ether, I lost my tickets and a stream of babies got through the line first and now nothing is open for me to get food. I’m starving and these are portents like the ancient Greeks’. I am Greek you know?”

“Huh? What? Babies? The world telling you something? What are you talking about?”

“I just think that maybe I shouldn’t get on the plane. The world is sending me all of these messages and I’m not listening.”

"The world doesn’t send you messages. Hold on, I’m at work, I have another call.”

Nervous energy increases. What is the world trying to tell me? Will my bag be searched? Will they discover the 2 kilos of pickled dilly beans I have hidden in my suitcase for the German boys? Or worse yet, will they discover the unreasonable amount of shoes that I packed? Will they take me into a dark room with one blindingly, bare light bulb hanging from a fixture and feed me to the shoe Gastapo who will one-by-one break the heels off of beautiful shoes until I give in and agree to pack more sensibly for the next trip?

Scott comes back on the line. “Honey, the universe is not sending you signs, please think of it this way – anything that is worth it comes with some trouble to make you appreciate it. You are going to be fine. Have a great flight and I will see you in a day or two.”

“Ok” I sigh, thinking to myself that he can say that because he doesn’t know about the whole bag of shoes that is being flagged right now by security.